DONOR PROFILE: Stephanie Murphy
"After suffering a miscarriage at 15 weeks in November 2017, my husband and I were anxious to try again. We struggled with infertility so our options for getting pregnant again are strictly through IVF. We waited about 6 months and then we tried again. Thankfully we got pregnant on our very next frozen transfer, in June of 2018. Everything in the pregnancy was going well until I hit 17.5 weeks and unfortunately my water broke; we were devastated but tried to hold on as long as possible. While being monitored we got to 20.5 weeks but unfortunately nature took its course and during Thanksgiving weekend I went into labour. I had my beautiful baby girl Adelyn on October 9, 2018, and unfortunately she was too small to survive.
Going through a second loss in less than a year is extremely hard physically and emotionally. This loss however was different as I was further along therefore my milk did come in. At first I thought it was a cruel joke, as if losing my child wasn’t hard enough now I’m producing milk with no child to feed. Initially I decided to let my milk dry up and move on. After about two days my husband and I discussed the idea of actually pumping and donating my milk to those babies in need, rather than letting it dry up right away. After all, I’d been given this liquid gold and it didn’t feel right just getting rid of it. So we got a pump and decided to commit to donating as much as we could.
This was very difficult. I needed to make sure I was pumping every 3 to 4 hours to keep up my supply, and with no baby to keep me on schedule I needed to be disciplined and organized to do so. We were able to donate approximately 325 ounces over the two months that I pumped. It was healing to know we were helping so many other little babies with the gift that our sweet Adelyn gave us.
I would definitely encourage others going through this difficult time to donate. I feel it did help heal my heart just a little every day as we continued to pick up the pieces and move forward. Thanks to NorthernStar Mothers Milk Bank for making this an option for all women, those who brought their babies home and for us that couldn’t.”
Thank you for sharing your story Stephanie. Your gift, at such a difficult heartbreaking time in your life, has made a difference for so many babies. Our love to you.